You know youre getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.

You know I could rent you out as a decoy for duck hunters?

Yo-Yo, Mine Kampf is Yer Kampf - cmon, check diz out!

Writing about music is like dancing about architecture.

Windows NT: Only 16 megs needed to play Minesweeper!

Windows Multitasking - screwing up several things at once

Windows 95: So friendly interface! It only needs 4.5 megs of help files.

Wife is exclusive hell for anyone...

Widows 95 by Necrosoft - Buy & die!

Why no one except moderator answers my letters???

Why is Amiga better? No Intel inside, thats why.

Why drink and drive when you can smoke and fly?

Why did Silly Billy throw the butter out of his window? To see the butterfly.

Why bad girls are so good?

Who is DOS? DOSs dead, baby, DOSs dead...